If I could choose to be reborn in this world I would choose to come back as a baseball umpire and be granted immunity for all of my mistakes that I would ever make. Controversy would ensue, including the fuel behind this blog, and I would win twice! Hah!
What in the holy Hell is Tom Hallion thinking? You can't curse at a player! Don't you get it? Are you confused as to what role you play in baseball? You're an umpire and you're above judgment! You cannot be touched, so why even bother letting a player get under your skin?
Hallion's problem extends further than yelling the F bomb at the Ray's David Price. Wait, wait...I'm sorry...I'm getting ahead of myself. I forget that not everybody reading this automatically follows the Tampa Bay Rays as if it's some sort of religion. Silly me. Let me fill you in.
Kids, yesterday the Tampa Bay Rays played the Chicago White Sox in a game of baseball...and I almost threw a bottle of scotch at the television for the level of autonomy that the umpires in baseball are given! Enter Tom Hallion, an umpire who has been around since 1985--the year I was born. If in my 27 years I can manage to string together a few coherent sentences that can actually be interpreted by the general public then I would assume someone doing their same job for the same amount of time could maintain some sort of professionalism.
And kids, I would be wrong.
David Price, starting pitcher for the Rays and reigning AL Cy Young award winner (and not that you would take my word for it but honestly a really, really good guy) was throwing pitches to Dewayne Wise, a hitter for the White Sox, last night when the umpire decided that he wasn't going to properly call balls and strikes anymore. That umpire was Tom Hallion.
Price thought he had delivered the necessary pitch to strike out Wise (because he did) but Hallion called it a ball. So Price threw again and Wise swung and missed. Price says that as he was walking back to the dugout he was talking angrily to himself over his struggles and apparently Hallion misconstrued it as directed to him. Price alleges that Hallion retaliated by yelling at Price, "Just throw it over the f------ plate!"
Hallion has already come out and called Price a 'liar' for the allegations and as the Rays dugout erupted to the supposed claim, Hallion even went so far as to eject Rays' pitcher Jeremy Hellickson for apparently reacting to an umpire cursing at a player he is currently umpiring! Hellickson, who I have never heard utter a discouraging word since his very first MLB start two years ago was apparently out of line. Give me a break.
This takes me back to the third grade when my art teacher told me to draw a picture of a duck and I gave my interpretation as a 'misunderstood mallard teenage rebel with a troubled past that he cannot escape'. I was so proud but then my teacher walked over and slapped me square in the face and said that ducks had rounded bills and not sharp beaks. When I went to the media I was debunked because my art teacher was the authority and I was just some kid who continually crapped his pants.
Pants-crapping aside, I hope that totalitarian view of the situation scared you into action. Three weeks ago I told you that umpires were abusing their power and going way, way too far. Now they're verbally berating players. A Major League Baseball umpire went on record and called a current player a 'liar'! Are you kidding? This cannot happen, even if he truly believes it and isn't just trying to cover his own ass, it CANNOT happen!
For this, Commissioner Bud Selig, I need retribution. David Price needs retribution. The Tampa Bay Rays need retribution. Hallion needs to be, at the very least, suspended. Players are fined every day when they complain to the media so why should he be any different when he came out and made such a bold claim as to call someone a LIAR!?
Look, I could care less what caliber of umpire that Hallion is, and there's plenty of statistics that people keep to show that he is, let's say, less than average as far as umpiring goes. People suck at their jobs. It happens. But when you suck at your job and yet you still go power hungry...well then you must be stopped.
If there is a fine line for every issue, consider this one leap-frogged over. If Hallion goes unpunished how can I feel comfortable having him umpire another Price start--or Hell--another Rays game at all? If he has the gall to name my guy as a liar what is stopping him from purposely making the wrong calls?
It's unfortunate but so is the world we live in. All hail the mighty umpire.
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